Verified answer

Preferences aren't superficial... Prerequisites are. It's superficial to solely go after someone based on a strict criteria, to the point you are affected by your feelings, or your feelings can "change" for that person...[i.e., love someone until they gained weight, got gray, was marred in an accident].

EDIT @ I Wrestle Polar Bears... What would be even MORE superficial, in your "preference", rather strict preference, is to not love him anymore because he no longer has dark hair, but it's thinning, and turning gray.

I've already been raked over the coals today. Even when I threw out a number of 120 lbs for a woman (just made it up), I had some berating me for an imaginary number. Preferences turn into superficiality only when a woman says so because a man didn't pay enough attention to her or automatically compliment her even if he isn't interested in her.

The difference is usually in the eyes of the beholder. I could view your preference as superficiality, or write off your superficiality as just a preference.

A preference usually comes with a justification [which is ironic since logically, we should never have to explain our preferences because, well, they're our preferences], while superficiality is usually unjustifiable.

It's when you let those preferences rule over you.

I tend to like men with dark hair more so than men with fair hair. Okay, that's fine. What's not fine is saying, "The only people worth getting to know better are those with dark hair."

when you are rigid about them? i think people get slapped with the superficial label too easily anyway. its usually used by people who are taking something personally so to make themselves feel better they try to justify why the other person is the one with the problem or discredit them by calling them superficial.

In all honesty I have no specific physical preference at all. If im attracted to her thats all there is to it, nothing more nothing less.

I love sammiches.