Can you translate poor English to English?

These expressions are very literally translated from Dutch to English. Can you guess their meanings and think of an equivalent expression? Or just wing it?

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1) I've got a wee apple for the thirst!

2) C'mon, bite through the sour apple..

3) That will not fit through the trolley!

4) This is fighting against the beer quay mate!

5) Someone's walking across my grave..

6) You shouldn't ask me the shirt of my body.

7) Joost may know that.

8) Now my clog breaks!

9) I'm off to snap a little owl.

Update:

.. Apple, good try! I'll give points to the most correct.. Or the most politically incorrect :o)

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