May 2021 6 61 Report
Delusional/Paranoid/Negativity/Guilt & Love--non judgmental answers please?

I have very low self esteem at times and am obsessed with a man who I've never felt such strong feelings for in my life. Lust yes, yet a true connection with such awesome chemistry. I believe one minute wholeheartedly that this man is very attracted to me & semi obsessed with me too. He is married. I never would have thought I would be attracted to a married man. We're both nice people and yet that it makes no sense to say that. I am a very paranoid person, thinking my attraction to this man will show through like glass and I often feel he really isn't attracted to me. I guess I just need to know at this point in time that he could have feelings for me, too. We email each other like crazy obsessed people, but all in fun & innocence. This has went on for months. Do you think that given I'm a paranoid person that he probably isn't attracted to me or is my gut instinct right? I never trust my gut when it comes to matters of the heart and sometimes I am wrong.

Update:

He has asked me to lunch twice, but that was about three months ago. He asked me to lunch once with a coworker, but I said I was too busy, even when he pressed the issue. The next time I made myself so busy at a company luncheon, ignoring him and he just stayed there waiting for me to come up to him, which I didn't. He made sure to innocently ask me to lunch those two times. We talk, but not very deep. He posted a funny picture of himself on my desk, as a surprise joke. I'm not sure if I'm am too standoffish, as I sure can be. Maybe that is why he is. A couple of my friends at work have noticed him staring at me and they're right on target there. He emails me sometimes from home. He appears to be happily married as I've seen them both together. She doesn't know we email. He is not a flirt in the office with others. He is a nice person. Am I reading into things too much? Thx.

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