so, i really like this guy. big crush!. But the problem is, i'm too afraid to confront him about it, and don't want to come off as pushy. i want HIM to come too me. after all, i don't chase after guys. anyways, i'm sort of a tomboy/girly girl. i'm on the swim team, volleyball team, and soccer. he is a jock, but he just joined the football team this year. i reaaaaaaaaaallly, reallllllly like him. and when i saw him with his so-called girlfriend, who's actually really ugly, it ticked me off to no end. i mean, she's not even pretty, and she's fat. All their cuddly-wuddly crap was making me nasucious. now, i'm starting to think he only went out with her either to make me jealous or because he knows she's a easy lay. but i don't even know if he knows i like him. i told some of my girl friends, but i don't know. gossip spreads fast in our school, so chances are he probably knows. And plus his "girlfriend" looked really UN instresested in him. like, she could care less. didimentionshewasugly?
Update:so how do i get this guy to notice me without being to obvious?? whenever he and his girlfriend break up, whenever that is. Do you think i should start to become friends with him to see what kind of relationship i'm getting myself into? I'm a really nice and friendly person, and i think that girl is just a hoe
I cannot control my feelings and they will not go away. i can't force them to. i know it's very stressful dealing with 5 extremely hard AP classes+ all my clubs and community stuff, term papers every week. ugh!!. i'm just stressed. i can't deal with school and falling for a guy all at once. but like i said, the feelings won't go away. and that itself, adds to a armload full of stress. any cure for stress?
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
I do not mean to come down so hard on you but you really need to take a moment and reread what you just wrote.
You cannot judge a book by its cover. You should be ashamed for thinking that this boy would not date a girl just because she does not meet up to your standards. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. And what is more some day you will marry someone who will see you not just at your best but your worst as well. Should they abandon you just because your eyes are puffy, your nose is running, and your hair is a mess?
I understand that you cannot control your feelings but you need to ask yourself... really take a good look at yourself and just ask if this girl is as bad as you make her out to be or if it is just easier to assume she would sleep with anyone so it will soothe your jealousy.
What is more... if you really think he is only with her because she is an "easy lay" then you need to ask yourself if he is this truly the kind of man you would want to be with? If it were only about sex for him then what would make you any different if he dated you?
In addition, as for attracting a man... be nice, be sweet, and be yourself... because if you are not... and he does fall for you then eventually he will see you for who you truly are. If you present yourself as someone you are not then the truth will come out and to the person you are with it will be the same as a lie.
I do wish you the best. I do not know that the best thing is being with him… but I do hope everything works out for you.
Honestly, leave him alone. He is in a relationship. Though you may think she is unattractive, he may find her very beautiful. Your judgement on their relationship is biased because of your jealousy and envy. You want the guy so you see an unhappy relationship. If they are cuddly and "nautious" then obviously they care about each other. If they break up, then you can go after him. Don't break up a happy home just because you find somebody attractive. It's wrong! How would you feel if somebody tried to steal your boyfriend?!
Obviously he sees something in her. Be fun and friendly when he's around. Laugh at his jokes, ask his advice, and compliment him on his playing. When his relationship falters, and most do at some point, offer to console him. Eventually they'll break up and you'll be half-way to being his girlfriend already. If people start to talk, explain that you're "just friends".
The start of any good relationship is to be friends first. Start by saying hi to him, acknowledge him in the hallways. If you have a class together ask him to be your studdy buddy.
obviously he's more mature than you for looking past his girlfriend's apparent "faults" that you see. Grow up. Not everything is about appearence...