about a month ago, my use to be best friend and i stopped being friends. i started being friends with this different girl who i went to high school with. her dad is not a religious person. how ever i am. now i know the bible says to be patient and non judgmental and the fact that he's not religious has nothing to do with anything. he's also one of those people that says "if you're in my house and you don't like something get out"
now heres my problem. a few weeks ago he said something about how he hated christians because they are so judgmental and i do have a few family members who are christians who are overly judgmental, and of course me being human i judge sometimes but i try really hard no to because i never know a situation a person is coming from and im in a wheelchair so i know what its like to be judged. but when he said that i let it go. now i know nobody is perfect but he says something like that and then turns around and talks bad about black, gays, and some disabled peoples (he makes jokes with me but it doesnt bother me) so on that i don't know if i should say "well you are being just as bad as you are accusing us christians of being, if your hands are clean then you able to cast the first stone." because as a christian im suppose to speak up.
also he was talkin 2 days ago about how he just deleted people on facebook because they are always posting how gods given them blessings and he thinks its ridiculous. i want to say to him that yeah since i found christ my life hasn't gotten easier but i have been able to find my life as a blessing and find the little things to enjoy in life and i am alot happier.
please no hateful anything im only 20 and im still learning the ropes of being a christian. just help me out on what i should say or i should let it go. i just feel like i try not to be rude to him about how he lives his life and he knows im christian and its just a respect thing. and i know as a christian im suppose to speak up i just don't know what to say.
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This is not an uncommon occurrence.
Some peoples hearts are just SET on not believing, and fighting ANYTHING to do with Christianity.
Just know that as Christians we are a light to world, not a remedy. What I mean is, some people have hardened their hearts so much that they simply will NOT listen. You cannot put that burden on yourself to try to get them to be a Christian. If your friends dad is like this, just hold your tongue like you seem to be doing a good job of. I know it can be tough because you KNOW they are going about things wrong and you want to help them. But they have to WANT help to get help. You see what I am saying?
Think about pharaoh when Moses was trying to get Gods people out of Egypt, even after all of these miracles Moses performed, pharaoh would NOT back down! You will most likely get discouraged trying to push Godly behavior on this man. Live a Christ like example while around him, eventually Christ reveals himself through your actions, He always does!
If you are set on making a difference in this mans life, do random acts of kindness to him, even though he is bitter. Love is contagious, eventually his heart will be touched and wonder what is different about you, and that is that Christ is talking and acting THROUGH you!
God likes to work in small ways, have you noticed?
I hope this helped, Good luck to you! And great question
You're in a tough spot. You see, christianity has changed so much in the last 20 or so years that many of us no longer recognize it AS Christianity - which is why I (and others) refuse to even capitalize it.
christianity has become a hateful, intolerant, bigotted grop of curel, dishonest, and tyranical idiots. You would be better off disassociatiing yourself with them. Believe what you want, but call it a different name becaue whoever they are, that political organization has hijacked the word christianity and if you say you are one, you will be hated by many.
There are exceptions, of course. Perhaps even a majority are the excepetion. I woudln't know. I am biased because I am angry about the loss of my religious freedom to those who want me to live in their theocracy - where their god/jesus is enforced and the enforcer.
You could just say that you are a thesit and be done with it. That way, there can be little offense to others.
But if you go around telling people that you are a christian, there might well be consequences. I do not have, nor will I have as a FRIEND, anyone who is a christian.. I just don't trust them and they make no sense. I have many associates who are christians, but I try to avoid them and only talke about specific issues with them.
You might well just be getting angry at reality. If trends continue, someone born today will achieve full adulthood (30s) when christianity has been demoted to the standing of a cult.
I am not a Christian
but he is a big old hypocrite
you admit yourself that some Christians are judgemental .. you admit that sometimes you are too
so you yourself have to try and change that although it seems like you are very conscious of it and try to change
but he is a bigot who thinks other people are judgemental
however .. it really isnt worth the hassle , he probably wont change because unlike you he probably doesnt see his own faults
I would just try and minimise my contact with him in order to keep your friendship
as a Christian you arent supposed to speak up
the bible tells you to dust off your feet ... just walk away
He is an elder and you are a visitor in his home. You have no obligation to set him straight about God.
Wait for an opportunity and if one doesn't come, it wasn't meant to be. He sounds jealous and petty . You could say I am a Christian and hope you to don't think I am like that or something like this . If he let's things drop. Let it go. He has heard the gospel and refused it . We don't need to defend or cajole and plead.
What would God want you to say?
Probably nothing. Look, what i'm trying to get at here is that That is his opinion about Christians, and Gays , and disabled. God knows what he is saying. And if really, the words he's saying to you are hurting you. God sees that. The only judgement that matters is Gods Judgement. All you can do is pray for your freinds father. God bless.*
Just let him slap you around. He has his own problems and is just teasing you to relieve stress. It's called displacement. Make a few friendly jokes about atheists if you want. Unless he overtly insults you or your family with malicious intent, then speak up and show him that you can be a man and stand up to people. He wouldn't want a weaksauce to date his daughter anyway. Just remember, you're there to hang out with his daughter, not him in particular. Prioritize why you are there. If you slap him across the face needlessly, you just failed your objective.
Any time he says anything that offends you, simply smile sweetly at him and say, "I'll pray for you." Don't engage in any discussion about what this means or why; don't get sucked into any kind of debate.
Better yet, don't even SAY it, just think it (and then, of course, do it).
This all supports your belief of being patient and non-judgmental. You don't have to confront or argue with this man to be a "good Christian". You also don't have to listen to any of his hateful, racist, disrespectful comments. I'd avoid being in the presence of this guy as much as possible.
His home- his life - not your business. It's easy!
tl:dr.
Blessings on your Journey!