so. i just got myself a boyfriend, he's so sweet to me and nice.
i have known him since the 4th grade (now i'm in 10th grade) and he has always been kinda a friend. I liked him in the 8th grade, and he flat out denyed me.. But i moved on, and apparently got better looking or more popular as I came to find myself freshman year. He apparently liked me at the end of freshman year and the beginning of this. The thing is when i started dating him, and callling him my boyfriend. My junior friend, lets call him jake got really jealous, he wouldn't talk to me period, and even ignored me. when i asked him about it, he said he needed to be away from me...cuz he couldn't stand to see me with my new boyfriend. i wasn't all to shocked, i knew he kinda liked me...but not talking to me? It went on for weeks til the other day he texted me, and said I love you.
more than jade (my bf) and more than life. And he told me about how he cried about it, and...he just wanted me so bad. I have come to realize I would have dated him, him not being such a player.
But has this player changed? He gets it from his childhood, his mom did't want him..and he looks for the attention of girls now, and i never felt special to him...But apparently I really really was, or so it seems.
He constantly talks to my sister about me. wondering what i'm up too. and he has finall started to talk to me, gradually..
he has changed, a little bit...but honesly i don't know what to do.
i think i love him, but i have a bf and i'm scared "jake" isn't completly a non player... but what should i do now?
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
The first thing you must do is to figure out which guy you believe is the right one for you. It's okay to be concerned about the emotional well-being of the guy that places second in your heart, but don't let that sway you away from the one you really want to be with. Once you have made your decision, make it clear to the "second" guy that you want to be with the first guy. This is probably the best reason why couples shouldn't consummate their relationships. If the one you want to be with wants to be with you for the long haul, he will be okay with putting off sex until marriage. Once I found my wife, I knew I would wait as long as she wanted before having sex with her. Even though my body wanted her every waking moment I was near her. If a guy gives you the, "If you don't want to have sex with me, you must not love me enough" speech, he's just in it for the sex and you need to dump him right then and there. Your true love will be happy to wait until after marriage. Always remember this. Spend time with your "first", and if it doesn't work out and you realize you made a mistake and if the "second" is still available and wants you, no damage will be done and you can become the "second" guy's girlfriend.