Racial conflicts.....Criticizing My B/F's Skin Color?
I'm going out with a guy that has different skin color then me.....and when we go out everyone seems to stare a whole lot.....my family don't stay behind( my aunts,uncles,cousins, etc)....they say I can get better....and every time that he comes over they stare like hell.....I get pretty damn mad, and sometimes I tell some of them off( I know I shouldn't do it, but what else can I do...... right?).....I feel they tell me that because of the color of his skin........what do you guys think?.....and what should I do about my family?
Thanks in Advance
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Stereotypes exist everywhere... people who are tall a strong leaders... people with glasses are smart... the Irish are drunkards... the Jews are misers and "penny pinchers"... etc. These stereotypes are the folly of the ignorant b/c they don't take the time to learn about other races and cultures... and they don't make an effort to realize that everyone has a unique potential to live up to. I say that more for your perspective than for your family.
The thing to do... and it is not simple... is to not try to change them. You won't be able. Pick and choose the events you wish to attend with your BF... and if he doesn't get upset at their stupidity than neither should you. If you continue to fight with them, it can drive a wedge between you and your BF. The better sol'n is ignore them if you can. And if they persist if offering their unwanted opinions, tell them that their comments only make you realize how much better he is as a person and how much more you want to be with him long term. If they are trying to break you up, they will shut up after that.
Hope this helps. Peace
No ! Being bi-racial is by background NOT skin color. My father is hispanic and my mother is hungarian however, like you I look very white unless I tan.. Does that make me any less bi-racial? I would apply anyway and see if anything comes of it.. Just be sure to have proper documention of your parents nationality if it comes up during the interview or written process. I think your guidance counselor is really quite wrong and I would seek another opinion ! Good luck
As long as you're happy in your relationship and he treats you well, and isn't rude in return, then there is nothing else that you can do. They can either learn to accept the fact that you have found someone that doesn't fit their mold, or you can continue on pretending to be oblivious to their ignorance.
Either way, don't let your family's shortcomings ruin your relationship with him, but don't let your relationship with him ruin the one with your family either. You both need to find common ground if at all possible.
When skin color means more that character, money will mean more than heart. Tell them that. I'm assuming your guy has character.
my wife is different skin
the kids are half/half
we still get the look from everyone who don't know
just try hang out at his house.
if his family don't mine.
and if that don't work tell everyone god made us all equally Special
if the whole world were without color,what a boring place it would be.if they only dislike him cuz of his skin color,thats racist.tell them to get with the Millennium.jeez.i hate racists!
Just ignore them. Either that, other talk to them about how you feel. We need diversity, and if you are dating a different raced guy, go ahead, don't let anyone else affect that.
it will be nearly impossible to teach old dogs new tricks. its hard to change someone's mindset. so you have to do what makes you happy and not let others influence you in a negative way.
its your life. not theirs.
They are right.
Tell them to ACCEPT DIVERSITY and get to know him.