Ok, I'm starting my sophmore year soon and really need help with my social skills. Last year on the first day of high school all my friends ditched me. I tried to talk to them but they wouldn't listen! I really don't know what happened but I guess the shock of it made me lose all socialness. I tried to make new friends but everyone had they're groups and no one wanted to welcome me into theirs. So basically I had friends in classes, but when around they're "real" friends, they pretended not to know me. I spent every lunch in the library. This summer I have done a lot of thinking and I know I have improved alot alot alot, but I still have a big problem. Whenever I talk to someone I'm not really close with I always blank out, I can never think of a response or something to talk about and am afraid I'll say the wrong thing. How can I be comfortable enough around new people to think of something to say?
Update:Also, I'm so shy and scared of what people think of me that I get really sweaty and nervous just when I'm answering a question in class, even if I know the answer! I really don't want to care what people think about me, I want to be myself, but I guess I'm not really even sure who I am these days! Help!
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
practice makes perfect
talk to people on chat rooms
talk to family (or strangers)
talk to everyone!
If friends ditch you that has nothing to do with you, it just has to do with how high school works. i have always looked at it this way, friends come and go so that you learn who was your true friend to begin with and how to make new friends and build relationships.
My brother is shy and he is a sophomore too. I just tell him that people are just as nervous to talk to someone new as he is, they just show it a different way. So my advice is, take it slow. meet one person in a class and just keep talking to them every day, maybe something will come of it and you can be welcomed in to their group and if not then move on. There are plenty of people in your school, I'm sure, and I'm positive there is a person that is need of a friend.
You could also try out for a sport or join a club because thats where people want to make friends and be part of a team and you'll instantly have something in common.
by the way, Don't think that you need to improve yourself to make friends, because being yourself will be a lot more fun then trying to be what everyone else wants you to be.
hope i could help