Reposting!
My husband and I are not getting along, there are too many issues that would take all day. We have a 10month old son and he filed for me and I now have temporary residency. We are going through marriage counseling right now but he says he's done and he wants out. I feel tired, exhausted and depressed through everything I've gone through with him and I now feel that maybe going our separate ways may really be the solution. What happens in two years, will I be granted permanent residency since there is a child involved? or I will loose it if we divorce? I know I could file under VAWA but I don't have money for the lawyers and I am tired of everything. What do I do?
He says he wants an annulment since we've only been married for 11 months (but been together for 2yrs) and also because he married me to do me a favor because I was pregnant and didn't want me to move to my country with his son. He's already been to immigration and told them he wants to withdraw being my sponsor, they asked him if I payed him/our marriage is faked and he said no. They then told him to go home and try to work it out. This just proved to me, that if we go our separate ways he's going to make sure that I loose my papers and also try to take away my son from me (which he ignores and doesn't do much for). I have been tolerating him because I need the permanent green card in order to live an honest life and to provide for my son without limitations, but I realize that this green card is coming with a hefty price, the longer I'm with him the more I feel a piece of me chipping away everyday. I feel I maybe depressed and I silently cry everytime I'm alone. I cannot afford to break down, for the sake of my son. If I could go on, it would take all day. Any opinions?
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
As it is very important to you to be able to stay in the States because of your son, you might be able to do so if you can prove that you entered the marriage with good intentions but it did not work out. I do think you will need a lawyer if you mean that your immigrant visa petition hasn't even been approved and that's the reason why you have temporary residency. If you want to divorce after a few months, it will be very suspicious for the officers who do not know you and who do not care at all. Unfortunately this is the truth. They can be very cruel even if everything is alright with the marriage.
I would like you to re-read what you wrote:
"I have been tolerating him because I need the permanent green card in order to live an honest life and to provide for my son without limitations, but I realize that this green card is coming with a hefty price, the longer I'm with him the more I feel a piece of me chipping away everyday."
I'm asking you what kind of honest life you can have if you got married for a green card? Was it worth getting married if you get depressed and can't live with the person of your OWN choice? Is a green card more important than your health and your son's real needs? (which are not money, just a loving family, you'll see in the long run) Do not think it will be easy to raise your son in a foreign country and it is not 100% that you can get remarried in the future. Can you imagine that your situation can be even worse? I don't know where you are from but I can't believe you don't have any options there. If your son was born in the U.S., his father's consent is necessary for you to take him because he is a U.S. citizen, which makes your case very complicated. That is why you would need a lawyer. It's not that I want to let you down but your relation to your son's dad does not seem honest at all and you know in that case immigration officers will probably find out about your real intentions. It will be very hard for you to prove you got married with the best intentions. You can try to persuade USCIS about the necessity of you staying in the States because of your son but they won't care for a single second if they find that you've committed a marriage fraud. That's the only way you can stay there but like I said if I were you, I would get a lawyer ASAP. I wish you good luck!
As a sidenote: if you are a green card holder, you are a permanent resident, not a temporary one, which increases your chances to stay in the U.S. You must be a conditional permanent resident. I think you have to notify USCIS if you divorce with all the details of your marriage and divorce. Try to discuss this with your husband and how important this is to you and your son. You will need his support. If he says you married him for the GC, you have no chance.
First try to contact a Community Based Organization to help you. They are like attorneys but they do it for free. This is usually like church organizations and stuff to help people in your situation. You can look them up online or maybe the phone book.
If you have not obtained the green card yet then if you divorce your application that is pending will be denied, b/c you would no longer qualify as the spouse of a US Citizen.
If you believe you qualify under the VAWA then definantely apply. You can look on www.uscis.gov and get all the info on the VAWA. When you are on the main page click on "Services and Benifits" at the top. then click on "humanitarian benifits" on the left side of the page. Then click on "VAWA" info. It will go through all the steps with you.
If you cannot pay the fee for the application you can file it with a fee waiver request. All you do is submit a letter requesting the fee waiver and state the reasons you cannot pay. I'm sure that happens a lot with this form. You can view the info about the fee waiver from the website I gave you also. If you are on the main page click on "immigration forms" and then on the right side it will say "fee waiver guidance" the important fee waiver info is at the bottom.
If you don't think you can file for that your only other hope is if you have a family member petition for you or you can have an employer file for you to become a pr.
Also your husband cannot take your child from you simply b/c you don't have a pr card. That child should hold dual citizenship through your country and the US. You may want to contact an embassy for your country here in the US to see about getting that proof. If your application is denied you would still have legal rights to YOUR child.
If you have any specific questions you can e-mail me.
I a US citizen and holder of 2 year green card divorce what is the status of the card holder?