I am transfering to University of Maryland with an AS in Business Admin after Fall'11 semester. I wish to attend its undergrad business school and i have to write an essay (300 word max) for entrance into the school.

Please critique my essay for passion, power, wording, intellect, and errors. THANK YOU!

During my passing years of post-high school, I learned something to be true, “Life doesn’t always pan out the way you’d like but the only thing you can do is play your cards the best way you can.” These were the words of a loving mom I had yet to understand at the time. After graduating high school with subpar grades, I had no concrete plans of what I wished to pursue, only opaque dreams of a successful career in the future. I decided to attend Prince George’s Community College because I knew my parents wanted me to have a degree and I knew of no other option. After the death of my mother and with no motivation or goals, I fell into a spiral of unsuccessful academic endeavors, which dropped my grades to abashed levels. At this point of my life, I was at rock bottom with no hope of success in the eyes of my peers, my family, and even myself.

Today, I am a different man than I was when I graduated high school. I wish to attend Robert H. Smith School of Business with Finance as my major. I intend to broaden my network and academic pursuit into ultimately breaking into investment banking. University of Maryland has always been my choice of institution, as my siblings have all graduated from there. In my whole life, I have never been so sure of what I wish to do and what I wish to accomplish. As an African-American male, from a disadvantaged home, and all odds stacked against me, I have found the zeal to become something better in life. I plan to help others like me when I graduate for unwavering proof that it’s not impossible to turn around in your darkest hour to accomplish something great.