Me and my ex-wife just got a divorce and agreed on joint custody. My kids are 7 and 5 years old. I am not sure how it is at there moms house now but every time she comes to get them all they do is cry and beg me to let them stay and it kills me!! Even if its just a total of 2 days that there going to be staying with her they still just cry there eyes out and I don't know why. When she drops them off they just run to me and are so happy to be with me. They always tell me that they want to live with me and they just want to go to her house for 1 day and stay with me for 100 days in there words. Anyways I was just wanting to know when they would be able to decide which parent they would want to stay with in the state of Tennessee?? I really don't think she treats them bad in any way or anything but it is very obvious to everyone that they are much happier staying with me. Would they even be able to make the decision on there own at anytime or will I just be stuck enduring the pain of seeing them cry so hard every time they leave me?? Please help!! Any information about the situation I am stuck in and the way that I would go for obtaining full custody would greatly be appreciated. Thanks!
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
Sorry, but it's not going to get much better. While the TN courts will take the children's choice into consideration - even so, from what you've said they're staying with you 5 days then with your ex 2. That's about what would be the court's ruling even without the kids input. Once they reach the age of about 12 maybe 13 the judge would take them aside - no parents - no lawyers. But the court will never say their mother can't see them - perhaps supervised visitation if for some reason they are being mistreated at her place. See if you can learn from the kids what's going on; I can understand having a preference, but all the crying and carrying on seems to indicate something more than just simple preference. If they are being mistreated there is a reasonable chance the judge will want to talk to them even now. Supervised visitation would mean they'd only be in her presence for 3 or 4 hours a week - maybe every two weeks - and even then under the supervision of a county employee.
Good luck.