I asked a question a few days ago. Most people said it depends on the specific spider. So my next question is, "how do I know if it's a good one or not?" The one at petsmart right now hasn't moved since I've started staring at it. Is that a good sign or not?
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For a first time keeper, the docile terrestrial and desert species are preferred. You can't judge a spiders temperament just with a quick look, and some spiders are much like a pet rock, only being active when feeding.
Choosing a first spider may not be difficult, just ask if a certain spider is good for beginners.
My first T was a Mexican red knee, and ideal spider for beginners. If you can deal with different cage requirements, the arboreal 'Antilles pink toe ' tarantula(tree spider) is great for beginners.
The Chilean rose hair tarantula can be moody at times but is another beginner spider.
Reading here may help you decide:
http://www.tarantulas.com/choosing.html
Tarantulas don't move much, they are very restive creatures for the most part. Being nocturnal, they become more active at night. It's not uncommon for a tarantula to stay in the same position for days straight.
The best way to get a "good" spider (as far as docility goes) is to focus on the ones that are generally known for that temperament. In each species, even the docile ones, there can be an individual who just doesn't meet the general criteria. For example, about one Chilean Rose in a thousand are intractable (cannot be handled due to aggression), although Roses are among the most docile tarantulas.
If at all possible, try to handle the tarantula you are considering a few times before you buy it. If you get it home and after at least a week it is still skittish/nervous, you may be able to return it or trade it for a calmer one.
Recently I ordered a Chilean Gold Burst from an online dealer. This individual was supposedly very docile and calm, but she turned out to be just the opposite! She was very defensive and even resorted to aggression once or twice. I was thankfully able to return her for a full refund (shipping was refunded, too, since I received a spider that was not as described) and used it to get two lovely baby tarantulas. The point is, if you do end up with a tarantula that you are unhappy with, you can usually have it refunded or exchanged.