I am a man in his early 20s. I've had sex many times with a couple of girls and some drunk one nighters with others. Every time I do, I am able to do it because I am either drunk, or because I've told the girl I'm with that I have sexual anxiety, she tells me that I have nothing to worry about, and I become comfortable. I've been lucky enough to have the two girlfriends be caring, understanding, and non judgemental. However, even a caring person can misunderstand a situation and make judgements about things that happen, and that's what I'm worried about for the next time I want to have sex with a girl, and I'm not drunk. What I'm getting at is that unless I'm drunk, I'm too nervous to have sex. There are no other problems with me sexually, I just have an unfounded fear of not doing it well, or not being able to do it at all. After the initial comfort level is reached, and I know that I won't be embarrassed by the girl I'm with, I'm absolutely fine. I don't have impotence problems. I'm supposedly really good in bed. But with a new girl, my thoughts race, I get paranoid, and even though I want to have sex, I'm so nervous that I can't. I know I'm opening myself up to rude answers with this question, but I'll ask anyway for only constructive answers. No religious answers, either, please.